In a few short days, I'll be getting married for the second time. I am beyond excited to write this next chapter with my partner.

I've done everything differently from my first wedding, for better or worse, and some things have worked while others haven't. It's been a wild ride of facing past trauma from my first marriage, humbling to know that I've made mistakes and made things harder by intentionally doing things differently, and incredibly beautiful to grow with my partner as we navigate this journey.

 

This process, surprisingly, has also reminded me of running a business. In today's newsletter, I'm getting personal and diving into what I've learned about business, love, and not ordering your wedding dress online without trying it on first.

 

Do What Feels Right For You, Not What Is Expected

It seems like there is a formula for getting married these days. For my first wedding (the stereotypical girl married her college sweetheart scenario), I did the church wedding, hotel reception, big dress, and bridesmaids and groomsmen. Our wedding date selection was based on the availability of the church and hotel. I didn't want anything like that this time around.

 

Our upcoming wedding date is the fifth anniversary of the day we met. We wanted a more intimate wedding (only us and our parents) somewhere meaningful to us and not expected. Although everyone has been supportive, there have been moments of, “Oh! You're not doing (fill in the blank).” 

 

Doing something that goes against the traditional formula, whether in business or wedding planning, may not always be understood by others, but that doesn't mean it's the wrong choice. If you're passionate about something, do what feels right to you. People will eventually come around, and if not, who cares! 

 

You Don't Have To Do It Alone

We are getting married out of state in Charleston, South Carolina, and with our work and schedules, going back and forth to plan our wedding was too much for us. Instead, we hired an event/wedding planning firm (much love to Sara and Hannah) to help us create a custom experience that fits us as a couple. They helped us find our vendors, secure our venue, and took a lot of stress out of the process. 

 

Don't be afraid to ask for and seek out help. Trying to do everything yourself is an easy way to become stressed out and potentially make yourself sick. I know I was guilty of that for the first few years of my business. Finding mentors, hiring contractors, and connecting with others in your industry or similar industries can make things easier and more enjoyable. 

 

You Get What You Pay For

To save money, I purchased my original wedding dress online for under $200. My rationale was that I'd only wear it once, so why spend a ton of money on a dress. The dress was pretty, but it never felt like THE dress. After losing some weight, I took it to a seamstress, but the way the dress was made, there was no way to alter the dress. To say I had an epic breakdown was an understatement. 

 

Ten days before our wedding, I found THE dress. When I put it on, I knew it was my dress. I took it to an incredible alterations team, and the dress will be ready the day before we leave to go to Charleston for our wedding. Talk about hitting the game-winning shot at the buzzer. 

 

Don't cut corners on your business or significant life events to save money. It could cause more stress than needed and cost you more in the long run (let's not talk about the rush fee for alterations). 

 

Have A Strong Vision

When planning our wedding, in addition to keeping it intimate and small, my fiancé and I decided on a theme of “Rustic Romance” for our wedding. We both have a connection to nature (him to trees and greenery and me to water and colors found in nature), so it was easy to pick a theme that would shape all the details of our wedding. Our theme made the process easier for us, our wedding planning team, and our all of vendors. 

 

Focus on the big picture, stay in tune with your core values, and communicate that to family, friends, coworkers, etc. Everyone will have thoughts and opinions about your wedding or your business. People will eventually see your vision, and you’ll be surprised at the magic created when everyone’s on the same page.

 

Don't Forget to Have Fun

The wedding may be the end goal, but there are so many small details and moments leading up to the wedding just as important or even more meaningful. For instance, my fiancé, who is a gifted artist, made the fabric for his wedding jacket. He went to multiple fabric stores, bought a bunch of fabric, and then cut and sewed one-inch squares, like a quilt, for his jacket. He then took the fabric to a tailor who made his custom jacket. It's an experience he won't forget. I can't wait to see the finished product on our wedding day! 

 

There were many special moments during this process, but I'll never forget the love I felt when a few of my friends surprised me for a bridal brunch or when my book club threw me a little shower where all the gifts were different date night ideas for us. This was a reminder that the wedding is a special day, but the marriage starts the following morning. 

 

Whether you own a business or work for a business, chances are you don't take time to celebrate all the wins or the milestones crossed. In business, the focus is usually on the next client, the next project, or on increasing revenue. What if instead of focusing on what's next, we all take a moment to enjoy the ride? Celebrate the small victories as much as you would the big ones. The magic is in the journey, not just in the end result.